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07 May 2012 @ 09:13 pm
Maternity Musings.  
First things first - I am making good on my birthday wishes. Special b-day shout-outs go to k8nkane, penny_sieve, starnightmuse, truesalcove, uponadream, and damoyre! Wishing you all a great year ahead! :)

And onto the musings!

Recently, I alluded on Facebook to a list of prenatal observations I've been keeping these last several months, which prompted my cousin to ask for the rest. Now that I'm halfway through this pregnancy thing (only 4 and a half months left to go... Holy crap...), I figured I'd satisfy my cousin's curiosity and list a bunch of them, not only for my own entertainment, but to see if anyone else out there has had experiences that resonate with some of this stuff.

Prenatal Observations #1-10:

1. I felt more energetic when I had Mono. I spent 3 straight months hinging on the edge of a catatonic episode. Picture that scene in HP3 when the dementors are sucking out Harry's soul. Now, replace the shrouded skeleton thing with a Teddy Graham, shove it under Harry Potter's shirt, and swap me in for the boy wizard. Welcome to my entire first trimester.

2. "Morning Sickness" is a horrifically inaccurate euphemism for "Neverending Stomach Hell". Because IT LASTS ALL DAY. Hell, I actually felt better in the mornings than I did at night, when it seemed like my Spidey Sense was warning me against anything and everything edible and/or aromatic. FOR NINE STRAIGHT WEEKS. I still can't bring myself to occupy the same space as a sprig of Rosemary, formerly my favorite cooking herb. *cries*

3. The world loves to compare the size of your fetus to food. Not only is such an analogy disturbing given your fetus has taken up residence in your belly-type-area, it's a pretty inaccurate way of determining the actual size. Every Tuesday I get an update from TheBump.com saying stuff like, "This week, your baby is the size of a cantaloupe," and I find myself thinking, "Wait, is that a genetically modified cantaloupe or an organic cantaloupe? One is much bigger than the other, if also much less flavorful. What if we're talking an heirloom variety? Ugh, all these food comparisons are making me nauseous..."

4. Pregnancy inadvertently gives people a stupid excuse to talk openly about your weight. This one bothers me a lot. Many people cannot help but say things like, "Look how thin/big you are! I bet you're going to be rail thin/enormous by the end of your pregnancy!" It baffles me how many well-meaning individuals tread into this unwelcome territory. How much weight I will or will not gain is not something I want to think obsessively about, especially seeing how little control I have over the situation. These days, the baby calls all the shots anyway, and if he wants me to indulge in an entire package of Hershey Bliss while screeching my metabolism to a halt, then I challenge anyone to stand between me and the bag o' chocolate, waistline be damned!

5. My hormones have made me a lunatic. One day, my coworker thought it'd be funny to jokingly challenge me on a grammar change I made to one of his letters in front of the rest of my office mates. The result: I almost announced [read: shouted] my resignation, after which I marched into the break room and, not finding the water cooler supplied with a full water jug, went to rage!retrieve the gazillion-pound refill jug by myself. I then went outside to continue my ragefest. When I "came to", I realized that "The Incredible Hulk" could have easily been inspired by some comic book writer's pregnant wife.

6. Public transportation and pregnancy do not mix. Between the hours of 4 and 5PM, without fail, the Gallery Place metro station smells like something has died and rotted in the trash bin. This is also the time of day when the trains are running on manual controls, which produces a ride home akin to mounting an electric bronco in a seedy Texan bar. Also, by this time of day, tourists meandering around the Nation's Capitol have had plenty of time to accrue a layer of sweaty stink sufficient to take down a mob (or so my nose perceives it) which mingles with the putrid trash smell in a most unwelcome way. To add insult to injury, the only people who will give up their seat on the train to a pregnant woman are - you guessed it - other women. No word yet on when I may be airlifted to/from my workplace...

7. My brain has been eaten by baby thoughts. It is what it sounds like. I can (baby) hardly (baby) think (baby) about (baby) anything (baby) else. ....Baby.

8. I am not afraid of childbirth. A sobering yet welcome byproduct of miscarrying is that I no longer fear the pain of labor and delivery. Even if my body winds up feeling like it's about to split at the seams from trying to deliver something the size of a watermelon out of a hole the size of a lemon, losing a baby makes other types of pain seem... well, less painful.

9. My body pillow is MY NEW BEST FRIEND. The creakier my joints get from all that Relaxin, the more I am becoming entirely dependent on my body pillow for a good night's sleep. It envelops me in soft, delicious, cushy goodness, keeping me off my back whilst I burrow my face against it like a toddler with an oversized lovey. It is the best. Thing. Ever.

10. Everyone must guess the sex of the baby. This isn't actually a huge irritant until people start going to great lengths to figure it out, pontificating, projecting, and poking included. Case in point: I was made to lie down while my cousin dangled a pendulum over my stomach, asserting that if it swayed back and forth, I was going to have a boy, and if it turned in circles, I was going to have a girl. It did both before stopping dead over my belly button. I was like, "No really, I can wait for the 20-week sono."

That's all for this installment, albeit there are many more observations to note. :) Honestly, despite all the hormone-amplified irritants on this list, we are, of course, beyond happy about being pregnant. Which brings me to the latest bit of news:

We're having a boy! :D (This major event produced at least 3 prenatal observations by itself, mind you.)

Mum's the word on the name for now, but it goes without saying we look forward to when we can announce it to the world. In the meantime, thanks for indulging my brain dump, and to all the mamas and mamas-to-be out there, Happy Mother's Day!

PS: starnightmuse made an awesome rec for a pregnancy/art blog by fanartist, Deisi. Upon perusing her entries, I laughed till I was red in the face at her hilariously honest comics. Enjoy her work at http://www.keepersoftheorb.blogspot.com.
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( 29 comments — Leave a comment )
Red Monsterredmonster on May 8th, 2012 01:24 am (UTC)
and if he wants me to indulge in an entire package of Hershey Bliss while screeching my metabolism to a halt, then I challenge anyone to stand between me and the bag o' chocolate, waistline be damned!

That's the spirit! If you can't eat with impunity when you're pregnant, then WHAT CAN YOU DO?!

Oh, and I never noticed that about Gallery Place, but I'm not surprised. I call it the Dread Line for a reason.
Venessamudblood428 on May 8th, 2012 01:31 am (UTC)
I agree wholeheartedly!! And to tell the truth, Gallery Place only smells that bad to me because my olfactory senses are super sensitive right now. What once was a "Hunh, it's sort of mildewy in here" has become a "GOOD GOD WHAT IS THAT STENCH?!"
Venessamudblood428 on May 11th, 2012 11:55 pm (UTC)
PS: Today, Forest Glen smelled like dead fish. I swear, someone's doing this on purpose.
Julieaggiebell90 on May 8th, 2012 01:38 am (UTC)
Oh, yeah. You speak the truth, my friend. Have you gotten the "random strangers think your pregnancy is an invitation to invade your personal space and touch your stomach" yet? OMG, that drove me insane. What I don't get is that a lot of the people doing those things are mothers themselves and had to deal with it when they were pregnant. Can they not remember what it felt like when it happened to them? Because you know it did!

Sorry about the rosemary. Hopefully that will go away once the baby is born. I loved bananas before I was pregnant, but I couldn't go near them during any of my pregnancies. But once the babies were born, I was back in love with them, so there's hope!

(And I still sleep with my body pillow. My youngest turns 6 on Friday. I think it's a permanent fixture in the bed.)

Also, yay for boys! They're so much fun. And good for y'all for keeping the name secret. As soon as you tell anyone, you're going to hear opinions. It's harder for your teacher mother someone to say, "Oh, no, don't name him that! I had an Andrew in my class last year and he was awful." *rolls eyes* It's why we called our last 3 kids BirdDog, BirdDog2 and BirdDogette until they were born. (No, really, that's what we called them.)

Venessamudblood428 on May 11th, 2012 11:33 pm (UTC)
lol Luckily, I haven't had to deal with too much touching... yet. I'm sure once I'm a little bigger, the temptation to invade my personal space will be irresistible!

Too funny about the BirdDog names! You are absolutely right about folks' inability to contain their disdain for a name you've thoughtfully chosen for your bundle of joy. We had mentioned it to a few coworkers, and my husband (the English teacher) was already met with grimaces about former students/jerks bearing the same or similar names. After that, we agreed to keep mum about it. ;)
Reneehpiknut on May 8th, 2012 02:15 am (UTC)
A boy! Wonderful! I know you two are so excited! When I was pregnant with my son, I remember the smell of buttered popcorn made me nauseous. Also, I loved eating McDonald's fries and a chocolate milkshake! Take care and I hope and pray you have a safe delivery and a healthy baby!
Venessamudblood428 on May 11th, 2012 11:36 pm (UTC)
Oh man, just reading "buttered popcorn" made my stomach turn. It's been a few weeks since I've felt truly nauseous, but there are certain things I still can't approach. Popcorn, salmon, Mexican food... all former loves now lost!

Also, it's funny you should mention the fries. I think that's the one food every single pregnant woman I know has said they tolerated above all other foods!

Lastly, thank you so much for your prayers. I can't say how grateful I am for them. *hugs*
Margiecauldroncakebkr on May 8th, 2012 02:17 am (UTC)
That was AWESOME!!!

The entire family was enjoying this as I read aloud.

So many of these observations happened to me as well. I'm glad things are going well for you dispite the hormones driving you crazy. Just wait till the crying gags start. You'll start bawling over not only spilt milk, but every TV commercial.
Venessamudblood428 on May 11th, 2012 11:37 pm (UTC)
Oh, forget it! Those have been happening since the very beginning! I was watching a National Geographic special about Titanic and couldn't help but have an emotional meltdown. Poor Mike, is all I have to say...

So glad you guys liked the entry. :) At some point, I've got to put up part two!
elka78elka78 on May 8th, 2012 02:34 am (UTC)
When I became pregnant, I was seriously annoyed with how pregnancy symptoms are portrayed in the film - it's always the sudden puking in some public place. Heck, I didn't even know I was pregnant (the first time around) until 8 weeks... and I have been blessed to never have any morning sickness.
But the exhaustion of the first 3 months is the worst.
Venessamudblood428 on May 11th, 2012 11:42 pm (UTC)
I totally hear you on movie!pregnancy being totally overdramatized and fake. Granted, my morning sickness was a general malaise that lasted all day with sudden severe pangs whenever I smelled something terrible - but it's like they show one scene of some poor girl puking into a public toilet, and that's supposed to sum it all up. Those of us unlucky enough to get morning sickness don't experience it for one day and then it's over!

Speaking of which, you are SO lucky not to have had any stomach issues. *envy*
Mistress of Squicktripperfunster on May 8th, 2012 02:47 am (UTC)
Being preggo was my green light to eat chocolate cake EVERY SINGLE GODDAMNED DAY!

I also love how being pregnant seems to give everyone in the free world the right to touch you. WTF? I'm not a crazy personal space person, but BACK THE FUCK OFF, CREEPY STRANGERS!
Venessamudblood428 on May 11th, 2012 11:44 pm (UTC)
Mmmmmm... chocolate caaaaaakke.....

As for being touched, so far I haven't been touched too much - but I'm sure that will change once I'm larger! As someone else on the comments said, my body will eventually become public "property". And I will want to punch everyone for it.
less QQ, more PewPew: omg!1!lenamoster on May 13th, 2012 02:08 am (UTC)
When my friend was pregnant and people came up and touched her, she had a very simple response that fairly gently let people know that that was *not ok* - she touched their belly right back while she was responding to their question or comment! It made them realize how weird it was to come up and touch a stranger without her having to say a word.
_infinite_enemy_infinite_enemy on May 8th, 2012 05:50 am (UTC)
What are the foods you CAN eat? I went through phases where if I didn't have a bucket of plain almonds/a whole avacado/peanut butter sandwich/etc I would go insane. I also could not stand the sight of sour cream at all!
Venessamudblood428 on May 11th, 2012 11:46 pm (UTC)
Amen to that! For a while there, it was just powdered miso soup for dinner, which was more depressing than I can say (since the powdered stuff is insanely inferior compared to real miso soup).

Honestly, the only thing that every made the cut with any consistency was chocolate. No matter how screwed up I felt, I could always get down a piece of Hershey's Bliss.
Amber AKA the Crochet Fiend....hp5freak on May 8th, 2012 05:56 am (UTC)
you make me giggle helplessly...you know that?

Woot! A boy!!!

More and more people I know are keeping mum on the name decision before the baby is born, and I say hold it tight! It's your baby, your choice....

*hugs and love*
Venessamudblood428 on May 11th, 2012 11:47 pm (UTC)
lol I'm glad it made you giggle. :) Sometimes, you gotta laugh because if you don't... well, you know.

We did spill the name to a small number of people, and quickly realized that was a mistake. Hence, the retroactive decision to keep mum!

*hugs and love back*
ƒωƒfireworkfiasco on May 8th, 2012 11:19 am (UTC)
I AM STILL ALL AFLAIL!! And congratulations on everything and ilu and be safe and dskjfldkj ♥
Venessamudblood428 on May 11th, 2012 11:48 pm (UTC)
Aw, thanks so much! If I had more energy, I would be all aflail too - but it seems the only flailing I can manage is the little dance that the baby does in my belly. :)
Clara M.drownyour_kiss on May 8th, 2012 11:06 pm (UTC)
I hear you on the all day sickness. Instead of gaining weight, I lost 20 pounds while pregnant from vomiting all day everyday. I kept a bottle of ginger ale and some crackers with me at all times.
Venessamudblood428 on May 11th, 2012 11:49 pm (UTC)
Oh heavens! I cannot imagine vomiting all day every day. I presume everything turned AOK? *frets*
Clara M.drownyour_kiss on May 12th, 2012 12:03 am (UTC)
Oh yes, everything is A-okay. Eva will be two years old next month and has hit every milestone at least two months early. Started walking at 9 months old! The other times I didn't get sick the moment of conception, we lost the baby, so I tend to think vomit=healthy baby now.
MariahGemmariahgem on May 8th, 2012 11:53 pm (UTC)
OMG I am always shocked at people's ability to think it's ok to talk about your weight and/or touch you when you're pregnant. I worry someday when I have a baby that I'll be slapping people. (Although, you could do it and then just blame hormones...) But for some reason people seem to think a pregnant woman is public property. Like, dude, that's still her stomach! Would you just go up and touch it if she WEREN'T preggers? No? Then don't!!!

And I'd heard the pin dangling thing before. It's weird, but the more I read about gender binary, the more I worry about why people are so obsessed with it. Who cares if your baby is a girl or boy, it's a BABY, it's precious, and wonderful no matter what it is!

Anyway! I'm so glad to hear all this! (Well except the bad stuff - the smells and the urpyness) It's neat to hear from someone my age who is in it! I can't wait to hear more!!!!
Venessamudblood428 on May 11th, 2012 11:52 pm (UTC)
OMG I am always shocked at people's ability to think it's ok to talk about your weight and/or touch you when you're pregnant. I worry someday when I have a baby that I'll be slapping people. (Although, you could do it and then just blame hormones...) But for some reason people seem to think a pregnant woman is public property. Like, dude, that's still her stomach! Would you just go up and touch it if she WEREN'T preggers? No? Then don't!!!

When you run for president, I will so vote for you. SO FLIPPING TRUE.

Looking forward to sharing more, soon! And really, no matter how uncomfortable this gets on occasion and how much I vent on here just to make a funny, I'm still like, "this is the most amazing thing that's ever happened to me." :)
lily_hbplily_hbp on May 9th, 2012 08:38 pm (UTC)
Rosemary is abortative so listen to your nose... I really enjoyed reading your journal! Bless you and your baby :heart::
Venessamudblood428 on May 11th, 2012 11:54 pm (UTC)
*gasps* REALLY?

Holy crap. Now I'm scouring my memory to see if any of it ever made it into my diet. Again, why isn't this stuff common knowledge??

Anyway, thank you for reading and for being so supportive. Sharing this experience with you all has been the highlight of my spring... next to the fluttering of my baby under my bellybutton. :D
lily_hbplily_hbp on May 13th, 2012 11:54 pm (UTC)
Usually herbs aren`t allowed during pregnancy (specially in high quantities). I`ve read Egyptians used some for birth control, and a lot of communities in Central and South America know this. Rue, rosmery, oregano etc. are very dangerous. Some are used to help childbirth. Even papaya is known to be abortative during the first weeks. So well, just listen to your nose and take care! Try to avoid conservatives and allergenic food even in the pregnancy. Lots of love
StarNight Muse: friendshipstarnightmuse on May 20th, 2012 01:54 am (UTC)
*bows* I'm glad the rec brought you joy and entertainment. (bit puzzled by the birthday wishes months in advance, but thanks anyway!)

wow I didn't knew half the stuff you mentioned.

#1 & #2- yikes. I really, really hope that's in the past now, because it sounds horrible.

#3- I never ever understood that, not to mention bizarre.

#4 never thought about it that way- but it makes a lot of sense. (question thought- what would be a good alternative? i know some family friends who are expecting and i would hate to be tactless- how would be a polite way to say "wow look at the time go! the baby looks like its growing and it's not too long since we can welcome it to the world!" without it being "your belly is so big/thin now!"

#5- oh boy. well at least i'm sure people know you dont meant that stuff.

#8- *hugs* everything is life is so relative isn't it?

#10- *scratches head* I dont know what's weirder-- That or all those books that say If you do this or that or eat this or that, or conceive on this or that day,etc to get either sex for the baby.

lastly--
CONGRATULATIONS!!! :D

*and good on you for not only keep tightlip on the same but Also having already chosen one.
(otherwise I would have probably have warned you about suggestions from fellow hp fans as far as baby names go
*No joke, an old classmate of mine is going to have a baby and someone suggested Severus, and I almost had a heart attack when i saw the mother to be consider it. . *shudders* it's all well and good for ancient greeks or book characters but a BABY? with THAT name?
*she changed her mind about it fortunately


take care and best of luck

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