March 6th, 2007

H/G Book 7 kiss

Bedbug Post-Mortem. As in, literally, after the pesticide cleared.

As you know, the bed bug issue has been... inconvenient. As a matter of fact, I would liken the process to moving out of my room and moving back in, only there was a helluvalot more bleach involved.

Don't believe me?

I present, THE EVIDENCE! (dun, dun, DUN!)

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I had to put all my books, clothes, and bed linens in ginormous ziplock bags. Friends, there is nothing - let me repeat, NOTHING - sadder than seeing your diaries, poetry books, and Harry Potters go into temporary storage because of the slight possibility that a bedbug has made a home out of them. That is me, gazing mournfully at my bag o' books, jutting out my lower lip in grief. Which is why my chin looks so weird.

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Yes, it really is the biggest ziplock bag in the world.

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Thank goodness my roommate, kirleyfries, has a secret identity as a master caulker. Because we caulked the HELL out of every crack and crevice in my room. Note the incredible caulking job she did on the leg of my bed...

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...And on the crack in the wall (which, I have astutely determined, is where the bugger would likely emerge from to feed after it's victim - um, me - fell asleep).

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Of course, it is necessary in these situations to ensure that the area and any young buggers are sufficiently cast into the fiery pit of death. For that, Bevan took my ghetto egg-crate shelves and dumped them into a solution of bleach while I scrubbed the crevices in the floorboards and carpeting with a bleach-soaked scrubby brush roughly the size of my toothbrush.

Right. Moving on...

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Imperative step here: the sticky tape. Bed bugs can crawl up wooden bed legs, but NOT if they're coated in sticky-tape! Look at the impenetrable fortress that Bevan built on the back of my bedframe! Try getting past THAT moat, suckazz! AHAHAHAHAHA!

Although there are no picture to document our next steps, let it suffice to say that there was much purchasing, throwing out, washing, and, dare I say, bleaching involved. And then... we had to Saran Wrap our fish to preserve them from the Exterminator's pesticides.

But, after all this, after all the blood, sweat and tears... the bed bug threat is (fingers crossed) gone. All that for seeing one frickin' bug. awsklfj;@#$&(*aowieg

So, the damage:

Ziplock Bags: $15
Mattress Covers (bed and box spring): $30
4 Different kinds of Caulk: $25
Double-sided Tape, Plastic Wrap, Scrubby Brush & Bucket: $10
Exterminator: (ask my landlord)

Peace of mind: Priceless

(Ahead: Icon/fic/art Pimpage!)